Monday, June 30, 2008

Not So Wide, Please.

Is there ever a perfect time or manner to tell your dear friend that she's fat?

Two days ago, I entered the cinema crisp and fresh (like lettuce) and left wilted and suicidal. I had done it. After all of the encouragements and death threats, I had finally seen Teeth.

What's it about, you say? Ah, innocence truly is bliss. Well, it's about a very prudish girl, who has a wonderful father, a delightful mother, teeth in her vajayjay and a pervert of a step-brother. And no, it's not by Disney. Remember when we first saw Scream and how we could not answer the phone for a week?.... yea.

But this post isn't all about this very-safe-sex-promoting visual extravaganza. It's about mouths. With teeth. 

I seem to be one of those people who follow the wise and ye old philosophy of "speak before you think", because I can never seem keep those inappropriate comments to myself, where they belong. 

Sample (but unreal.......) scenario: Kate and I going to the cinema to watch Teeth. Kate wears an empire-waist tube top with straps hanging from the middle. Kate gets popcorn and a bottle of water (cliche, but real.)  I wait for her outside the toilet. She comes over. I notice her top. I go: "You better not tie those straps around, or that top will look like maternity wear." Kate looks pissed. Obviously. I do damage control by saying: "Well, I didn't mean it like that." End of scenario.

Now, I shall give a million to anybody who could have handled this situation better. Any takers?

Photo Source

No comments: